2 - Identity Crisis, Anyone?

Who am I? Who are we?

Welcome back to The Lydia Effect.

Last week, we named the hunger stirring beneath the chaos — the longing for meaning, belonging, and renewal. This week, we dig a bit deeper into the backstory: the identity crises shaping us and the world around us today.

Did you notice the hunger for certainty and meaning in the world around you this week?

I did and I also found something in myself that will take me a long time to unpack – my own identity shift. Retiring suddenly after a career in science and technology has been disorienting (I shared more about that story here), and now my son is graduating from high school. So, I have two anchors of my identity changing at once. The last time it happened to me on this scale was when I became a mom, so I predict another painful birth of a new self, shaped by uncertainty, prayer, and quiet transformation.

Maybe you know this feeling that happens when a child goes to school, a job ends, or a familiar habit changes. There is grief and a feeling of confusion and loss.

Photo by Vince Fleming on Unsplash

We’re not alone in our need for stability. As I sat with my own shifting identity at a short retreat last week, I realized: this isn't just happening to me. It's happening all around us, too. Identity issues seem to be everywhere, in communities, organizations and even nations.

What makes identity such a serious issue?

Identity is Everything

Identity shapes everything. It is our DNA, our life, and our past woven into our present. The brain filters so much through the single question: “Who am I?”

Who we believe we are organizes our thoughts, emotions, habits, and choices. It controls what we love, what we fear, and what gets our loyalty. If you lose your true identity, over time you could lose the thread of your life itself.

Identity is the hidden deep taproot from which our life grows.

When identity is stable, it reduces anxiety, increases resilience, and supports healthy relationships with good boundaries. When identity is unstable, it unravels our inner world potentially to the point of anxiety and depression. Without a grounded sense of who we are, confusion erodes our values and goals and can make us more susceptible to manipulation.

Identity also binds us to one another in community. We want to belong – it’s a human need to have a place with others in a larger story. Social identity gives meaning, purpose, and a place in the world. But when shared identities like family and culture fracture, individuals become isolated and vulnerable.

Photo by Михаил Секацкий on Unsplash

When we lose connection to our identity — as individuals or as a culture — the results look like what we’re seeing now: restlessness, loneliness, grasping for self-worth and meaning in all the wrong places. Without a true identity, it’s like navigating life with a broken compass. Every decision lacks stability because there is no direction that feels certain.

But even when we lose the trail, it’s not truly gone. That taproot of identity is still there, buried deep inside us. So, what is it?

Who am I? Who are We?

As I move into my identity evolution, I feel stable because I have a compass, and I dug deep into the taproot. At my core is the sacred truth that grounds me more than anything I could ever achieve or do: I am made in the image of God. And so are you.

So why do I have hope for the identity crises and transition in the world? Because I can feel a renewal coming, and I know that we didn’t really lose our identities—because we can’t. Underneath all the noise and fragmentation, that taproot is there: we are still made in the image of God. That is our identity below all the other things we do or try on. And it doesn’t change.

We seem to have forgotten the most sacred thing of all — our divine identity. It is hard to remember that before we ever succeeded or failed, we were already stamped with the image of God. We were created for love and to live in relationship, reflecting divine beauty into the world.

Where did we lose ourselves?

When science and facts started ruling the world, our divine identity sometimes seemed optional. So although technology didn’t create the identity crisis, it accelerates and distorts communication that feeds our identities, often leaving us more isolated in information silos. Maybe you noticed your social media feed seems completely different from a friend’s, fashioned avatars or digital identities that don’t really match who you are, or watched arguments that make it seem like people live on separate planets. Inside our phone microworlds, it’s easy to forget we were created for love and relationship when our identity itself is under siege.

Photo by Kev Costello on Unsplash

Honestly, the way technology has teenagers caught in an experiment makes my heart ache the most. Their minds feed on questionable information and images that invite identity crises, while at the same time, connecting them to their friends like a trap. It’s tough to witness — to see how easy it is to lose the thread of who we are.

I know what it feels like to lose sight of that thread. Has this happened to you, too? Did you find it again?

The Journey Back

For a long time, I wandered too. My curiosity led me searching and questioning, seeking something I could trust both with my heart and with my mind. When I rediscovered the thread, it was like unveiling something that had been there the whole time. So yes, the slow process can be confusing and painful, but I keep telling myself, and my son: there’s a hidden opportunity inside every transition.

For me, rediscovering my true identity set me on the path that would eventually become The Lydia Effect. I felt rooted and purposeful, which is critical as I face another transition.

Although my advanced degree in science and career gave me a feeling of achievement, it became a habit to ignore my heart and what was sacred. I followed the longing I had and started finding my way back during the pandemic, one step at a time, but the biggest struggle has been finding a home for my faith journey. My identities —a scientist, woman leader, and single mom—didn’t make this process easy.

Maybe you're there too, standing between your past identities and the deeper home your heart longs for. If so, you're not alone. The search for belonging, for a faith home is holy work— a journey that takes courage, patience, and humility.

We’re almost at the part where Lydia makes her entrance. She helped me see something different, and her story might just show you something new, too.

Next week, we’ll step deeper into the search for a faith home and discover how Lydia’s story gave me courage and hope.

Next Chapter - 3 Finding a Home for Faith

This section in each post is a pause to create space in your own heart and mind to process your own story.

This week on identity might give you something to journal about or discuss with a friend before the next chapter.

Reflection Prompts

• Have you experienced a time when a familiar part of your identity — a role, a relationship, a title — fell away? What was it like for you?

• What does it mean to you to be created in the image of God — for love, relationship, and sacred connection?

I also recommend The Buddy System — reading with a friend so you can talk about each chapter.

• Have you noticed technology shaping how you see yourself or others?

• Do you have a story about a life transition that affected how you saw your identity?

  So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.
  Genesis 1:27 (NIV)